Life's Ex-citations

I Do? Holy Crap!!!

2008-04-20T10:43:00.005-07:00

Um so I may have been away for a bit there.. 1.5 years it looks like. Sorry I was out Living.

But I figured I would repost my blog as I've finally got settled down again... somewhat.... for now anyway. After reading most of my posts again I realize I've been very distracted from writing down my thoughts. Which is both a good and a bad thing becuase it keeps me from going crazy; thinking too much, and foils my attempts to be bitter. However, it seems like I will be getting married next year... yes MARRIED! I was completely surprised with that particular tid-bit of news. I guess when a guy really makes a decision to be with someone there is no wasting time. I mean I thought I would have had to wait a lot longer. not that I would have waited forever mind you... but i dont mind waiting

Getting married is a big step, and its made me quite introspective on what to do next in my life. Its made me realize that I no longer cringe at the idea of marriage though i had some help thinking about it, or the process of getting married. or that it will always be a bad experience. though its been proven to me that its not or that i will remain childless so as to look forward in undermining my sisters kids if and when she has any.

I've already booked the hall, found a florist, met the priest, designed the party favours, and labels; bought a dress ( though my moms pissed that she didnt get to look with me) semi finalized the reception list. So yah I've been a little busy.

Winterlicious!! Summerlicious

2007-01-11T06:14:00.002-08:00

Its back on again! did i mention i like good food alot. ive always like going to the nice places to eat. its good to treat yourself to good gourmet completly over expensive food at least once in a while. im lucky this only comes around once in a while.

In the last couple of years that ive participated in it, ive noticed that the same restaurants generally keep coming back every year. thats not to say that the menus arent fantastic and different every time, nor does it mean i have a big enough bank account to go to more than 2 restauarants per year.

but the places ive been whether for winter/summer licious have been excellent.

Canoe - i went when i was in school still, i could only afford the wild mushroom soup. which was fantastic! the time i was there during the lightening storm was pretty cool too

the next time i went the food was excellent and the dessert was out of this world molten lava cake.. i dont know what they put in it but i really would have eaten another, or gone in the kitchen and taken more and run.

Auberge du Pommier - the food rocked!

UPDATE: WTF have you been?!

2006-11-04T08:30:00.003-08:00

So..... I haven't posted anything in 4 months at least (feels like confession actually) and not that i haven't wanted to but things happen, people get writers block, preoccupied, distracted.

What has been distracting me? quiet a few things let me tell you! I'm relearning how to swim, i got a new camera ! a slick canon Powershot s3 IS, which is permanently in my purse, and i still need to get a case for it as its getting a bit knocked about. hopefully i wont break this one as quickly.

I've been slowly, ever so slowly saving for a place. which is a great deal harder then i thought it would be. I guess its going to take a lot longer then I thought.

Don't tell my mother but I've been learning to cook as well. I am impressed with myself with the things i can actually make without burning anything.. though there was an incident with a pound of beef and hamburger helper; and burning a pot.... and then there was the other pot I broke crushing ice.....

But ! i can make the best veal steak ever! and lazengea and salmon with couscous with roasted peppers and mushrooms! i even made cupcakes ... so there!

My job has been going alright, but I've been distracted from that, which has gotten me in trouble, but I've been working on correcting that, by at the very least getting more sleep, motivating myself to go back to the gym, and getting over getting hit by a truck..

Apparently I didn't really get over that. I'm not sure though sometimes I'm OK and sometimes I'm not. i can't sit comfortably in the side passenger seat, especially when big honking tractor trailers go by, and I won't drive in the far left lane any more on curves. I guess it will take a while.

Paid - Payback

2006-07-28T07:22:00.004-07:00

this post has been a long time coming. But I finally finished paying off the loan for the car. The car from fucktard (see here for that tale of woe). Mind you its ironic that 2 months after paying for the car, I ended up cosigning on another car with my mother this one to buy as oppose to lease.. But I remember signing the papers for the new car and almost hyper ventilating and getting hysterical because I was doing it all over again.

Fucktard never did keep his promise. I never really expected he would. He is a would-be politician.

Cauliflower : The Albino Mutant Vegetable

2006-07-05T06:10:00.002-07:00

I Can't eat it! I refuse.. if there is anything I won't eat (along with one or two other food substances) this is it.. I am very anti-cauliflower.

Why? do you ask? it is just a vegetable. It can be a rather nice one when it wants to be. However I hate the damn thing.

IT IS AN ALBINO MUTANT VEGETABLE! a bad brassica, a cabbage of disrepute, a mother to the dreaded broccoli, and its origins obscured in the ether of the middle ages. so you have no idea who! has been fiddling with it over the years

I just don't like its pale little white flowers। and it is rather tasteless. I know it comes in different colours but I still wouldn't eat it... Especially when the colours it comes in are purple and orange.

and brussel sprouts are its bastard children

Mack Truck vs. 2002 Neon

2006-06-22T09:00:00.001-07:00

Crash! ....I totaled my car. with a semi truck..

So. I've only been driving for 6 months, and of course that being said I got into an accident. not just any accident, an accident involving a 16 wheel tractor trailer. Because when I do something... I do it with style and flamboyant. but I will say this... it wasn't my fault... Entirely.

I was coming from downtown, and instead of going home I went to visit my friend on the west side, and on the way back driving in the express lane of the highway, in the far left lane I noticed a truck beside me.. not just any truck of course, one of those huge tractor trailers, hauling what I think was dry wall. any way we were coming out of a curve and this giant truck starts creeping too close to my lane and to me. so I sped up to get the hell away from it, because I really didn't want to be squished between the highway divider and and a semi.

I don't know how it happened but it happened damn fast. Cause the next thing I know the trucker trailer clipped the back of my car with its wheel and I went spinning out of the left lane into the far right, even did a 360 spin before some how without hitting any other cars swinging back into the left lane.. However, I wasn't straight in the lane I was horizontal to it.. so I got a drivers side view of an oncoming tractor trailer just before it hit me square on the drivers side door..... and that's the part I remember most. Looking at the front of tractor trailer grill, being surprised that the door window wasn't breaking, the smoke and the smell of rubber and the sound of breaks, while it pushed me down the highway for what seemed like a long time. Eventually the truck came to a stop and I was pushed off the front of tractor trailer.

I think the first thing I thought after that was "Oh Shit!... my mom's gonna kill me!" the second thing I thought was that there were going to be a lot of people worried about me... and I really didn't want them to worry.

I remember finally taking my foot off the brake. not even realizing that I had slammed on them and turning off the car... you know just in case after all of that the engine decided to catch on fire. in doing so my car rolled forward and tapped in to the highway divider with a loud Thunk.

By then the trucker had come out of his vehicle to check on me.... I remember him being incredibly surprised that I was ok and not dead. and I was ok.. I wasn't hurt ( well not right away) I wasn't bleeding and I didn't even have any bruises. but I was shakey as shit. I remember the trucker coming to open the door of my car and being unable to because the car door was so bent out of shape. I was able to get up and stand and walk around but all of my reflexes were firing and I was in shock..

What I did see was a front drivers side tire that was completely crumpled as well as the side of the car from the front lights to the driver door completely mashed in, and the back right wheel completely grazed and scratched up. the truck just bent its front bumper a bit.

it was kind of funny.. or at least I found humour in the whole thing.. not that I wasn't grateful to be alive. but its damn funny. I think a lot of the people there were surprised that I seemed so calm and if not a tad flippant. I think I was so humorous about the whole thing because I was embarrassed and disappointed with myself. Usually I'm really cautious driving..

but I wasn't suppose to be on the highway at that time to begin with.. as I'm still a G2 driver. and I should have known better then to pass a truck on a curve on high speeds. and I'm incredibly lucky.. Damn lucky even.

the tow truck came pretty quickly and I was interrogated by the highway opp fairly. though I was charged.. failure to drive in a marked lane... which in reality is a fairly light charge considering the cop was going to charge me with reckless driving. but I'm going to fight it in court as I don't think I'm at fault,, it all just happened so fast.

but anyway I'm ok now.. I even went to work the next day..

Divorce

2006-06-11T09:03:00.001-07:00

I don't like it.

It's usually means a failure, and I hate failing at things, what I'm more likely to do is give up on things and end something before they could ever reach that point. (I believe its called running away.)

both of my parents have parents that have divorced, my mom grew up with her mom and would go visit her father in the city.. I don't think they were very close and my mom didn't really like her dad's new wife.. (who I think was a nice lady or tried to be to my mom) she doesn't talk about it, I think even if I asked her she wouldn't talk about it.

she talks about my dad's parents divorce. I don't know why it didn't work for that one, but my grandmother took her kids and kept everyone away from them. I think to some degree its shaped the way my dad interacts with people, which is not really. He keeps a lot of people at a distance and does not share, what's on his mind. If someone pisses him off he cuts them out of his life or won't speak to them. He's got family that always calls to see how he's doing and he never really seems to respond back.

So it comes to my parents, you would think that having parents themselves who have gone through it they would be a little more understanding about their own marriage relationship.

I've always seen my parent fight, for the first 25 years they have always fought. and not about little things though that's what starts it off. About things like infidelity, lying, money, bills, talking to each other, raising kids (me in particular) . They've argues so much that my dads slept in the other room, then the basement, then somewhere else (cause my mom kicked him out). and every time they would make up, and there would be some major change. Like buying a new place, or a new sibling. It got to the point where I would come to expect that the two of them were going to fly apart at any moment. and that they would get a divorce, my moms talked about it often enough.

sometimes I still wait for it. That's why its surprises me that now they actually seem to like each other company. I see my mom smile at my dad more, and him in turn... maybe they just got old. or maybe they finally started talking to each other, or making compromises with each other, I don't know. but I hope it stays this way because I've never seen them this comfortable or happy with each other.

Only thing is my mom says I'm just like my dad.

point of order

2006-05-14T16:09:00.001-07:00

I found someone that i cannot stop thinking about... is that a strange thing? i think about him when others are talking to me. i remember like a daydream they way he feels against me.. or in his arms.. he makes me smile. he's a nag and gives wonderful advise. he teases me. and it still makes me glad to be around him. being with him one day the memory of it lasts me the entire week when at the end i hope i can see him again..

falling hard for some one is not pretty. I am more scared, more uncertain. and more likely to do something stupid to avoid the entire situation.

but i want him. and a part of me needs him already.... im gonna get my heart mushed up i know it. This screams fuck up

today

2006-05-07T17:16:00.001-07:00

I don't feel like a nice or even a good person today.
Not in a "I-want-to beat-up kittens" kind of way... just rather blahh.

Things on the net

2006-04-20T11:29:00.001-07:00

I've used or been on a number of online services it surprises me actually how many I grew attached to.. And then stopped using.. Or still use.. They are all pretty good though

http://www.beadfx.com/ - is a great site to take classes and buy beads. I'm actually going back this Saturday to try and learn to make a wire bracelet.

http://www.clubzone.com/ - I still use this site if only for the message board and to find things to club on.. I'm sure there are better sites but its the only one that kept me fascinated . Lots of interesting clubbing people online too.. Though I've never met any of them.

http://www.torontostar.com/ - read the paper.. Only cause I don't like getting the ink print stains on my hands... Its more lazier reading it online

http://www.worth1000.com/ - I use to do a lot of photoshop work. and I enjoyed the challenge of doing an image toward a contest... Never did that many but it is still a really cool site.

http://www.plentyoffish.com/ - when in doubt of finding a significant other or at least a date. This was a good site.. Though again for some reason I was to much of chicken to take up anyone's response.. I'm just not cut out for dating sites it seems.

http://www.deviantart.com/ - again some of the more hard core actual art that I've done is on this website. Which is amazing! It makes me totally look like an amateur which I am.

http://www.twofortheshow.com/ - before meetup.com there was this site.. I only ever met one person off here. We went to a symphony.. And then I never heard from her again.. I think its because I'm potentially crazy.

http://www.meetup.com/ - I'm not on this site anymore it irritated me to no end that you couldn't make friends off this site though that was the whole point.. Though I did meet Sil on this site so it couldn't have been all bad.

http://www.photobucket.com/ - great free site to host all of my web photos.. The concept for paying for space online to store stuff seems incredibly un-workable... But for some reason people do it.... This isn't one of those sites.

3 month Mark/Rant/Summary

2006-04-05T04:48:00.001-07:00

Holy crap! Its 3 months into the new year, and spring has supposedly sprung.. Even though it snowed yesterday. A number of things have happened I guess..

learned to drive. which is really funny cause I promised myself that I would only drive the car downtown when I had an offset meeting or a site visit to make somewhere outside the downtown core..It hasn't worked out that way since I drive every day now. (haha!). Best thing is I don't have to pay any insurance..

started dating again. so any way I did start dating, I'm not listening to the advise I got to go on a lot of dates.. With different people, mind you before jumping into anything serious I'm going to take it slower then dirt this time. It surprises me that its already been 4 months o_0. Though the one thing I find really annoying is guys who repeated ask me to dump who I'm dating and date them instead.. I don't even find that funny.. And why cant interesting guys just be friends... friends WITHOUT benefits. And Jesus! What is with those needy angst repressed guys?! I should have been a lesbian, maybe its easier.

Health Insurance. once again working full time has really good benefits. I finally got a family doctor Dr. G; she's pretty cool.. shes so Pennsylvania though. She had to give me a needle in my butt. I think the patients in the waiting room must have been freaked out by all the screaming.. AND whoever said that getting a needle in you buttock cheek is less painful .. LIED!

Save. its really nice to save money! Even though I'm still saving for the car. As fucktard never did keep his promise to start paying back for the car. I'm not really surprised though I never really believed he would anyway. Just another cheap way to get under my skin. But finally ill be done by the end of may. And then I can pay off my credit card and start saving for that condo. I'll hopefully have 12,000 by the end of the year.. (triple that for next year) which is pitiful considering I was suppose to start saving since January. But again, got messed up with promises from fucktard, and used the money for my trip.

Volunteered. my friend Sil keeps trying to get me to volunteer for things. Probably to keep her company. Which is fine. Any way she got me to volunteer at the fuu-fuu-shee-shee fundraiser silent auction. If this is volunteering I might be persuaded to do it more often. All I did was smile, walk around eat the food, and drink the alcohol. And then I got free tickets to a baseball game, 2 giant gift bags full of stuff, and tickets to the lifefest, which was even more free stuff. I took my mother it was her birthday the day before. She loved it, free stuff is always a good thing :p.

anyway back to work.. I'll think of some more things in a while

house party

2006-03-19T12:25:00.001-08:00

I didnt get out much when i was younger. didnt get invited to a party ever... not entirely sure why.. it may have been the fact that i was a nut.. and mostly focused on school and lived in my own world.

But last week my friend Sil invited me to this very nice birthday house party and i had a blast. got invited to another one this weekend. it was interesting every one knew everyone else. it was kind of like coming in on an episode of friends, and being the new character. i hope i last more than a season personally. the host was a very nice man, he likes musicals, which means if there is ever a time i wanna see "annie get your gun" i know who to ask. or opera.. i need a new opera buddy. and a new art gallery buddy.

oh and i got invited to another party next week. should be interesting

Vacation: Day 2 through 14

2006-03-19T12:18:00.001-08:00

so any way after that it went down hill from running from sight to sight taking photos. sitting on the train, alot. London was crap only becuase i was loosing my patience and at one point ditched my family. and ran around london on my own. at my aunts house in Tring she fed me.. wonderful wonderful food. and i was better. the flight home was much better. im still working on my knitting project that i took up and i still feel like i need another vacation just to rest up.

Im going to NEW YORK ON MY OWN!

Vacation Day 1: the Airport

2006-01-19T11:14:00.001-08:00

So I didn't tell you about my trip to England and France did I.... that's probably because I do not want to relive the horror and the trauma, but i'll tell you anyway. since people asked.

Monday Dec 19th at 6pm was the flight, so of course we had to be there 3 hours earlier at 3pm in order to get processed so we could sit and wait 2 hours for our plane to arrive. Which is normal for any start of a plane trip. However I knew this trip was going off on a bad start when the airport taxi arrived and instead of being a van was a regular sized car.. for 4 people.. with 9 pieces of luggage. After 10 minutes of squishing our bags into the back trunk and the front seats and holding whatever luggage we could on our laps we made for the airport.

Pearson Airport is incredibly large and incredibly busy and not the kind of place I would like to come to every day, but at the very least we got checked in without any fuss (no bags overweight thankfully), made it through security (well I did anyway, my mother and my sister couldn't seem to make it through any of the metal detectors without setting them off), and then sat and waited in the waiting area near our plane. I must admit I still am fascinated with x-ray machines we flew KLM, (which I am never flying again) and this is were the fun begins. Our plane was on-time however we spent an extra 10 minutes before take off for whatever reason, probably so the pilot could smoke some crack. So while we are in the air the pilot says that he will be delayed maybe a 10 minute delay upon reaching Amsterdam, where we are making out connecting flight to England. All in all it was a nice flight, the meal was decent (no one got food poisoning) the movie I didn't bother watching and the alcohol was free.

Turns out we miss our connection to England by 5 minutes. and were 30- minutes late getting in, it was like a scene out of "Home Alone" were the family is running through the airport trying to catch their plane, however on reaching our gate (which had already closed), we were greeted by KLM stewardess that informed us that we had been booked on the next connection flight and again we would only be delayed by 30 minutes... "so there was nothing to worry about please go sit over there" by now it was 10-11 in the morning in Amsterdam.... and our connection to France wasn't until 2 in the afternoon. Oh yes, instead of booking a direct flight to France we were going the long way, which was being made ever so longer.

it was made even longer still when they cancelled our rescheduled connection flight and then took 2 hours to find us another flight! I ended up having to stand in line to get a phone card so I could call the train station and try and save our train tickets.. and in doing so save having to pay 235 POUNDS to get new tickets. because on reaching England we still had to meet up with my uncle so he could take our extra bags, and then we still had to take public train to get to Waterloo station were the train to Paris was waiting for us.

We were very lucky that they didn't charge us 235 pounds again for missing out train. However by now it was already 5 in the afternoon and we were still in England waiting for a train. Then it was another 2 hours to Paris.

on no sleep for almost 2 days and finally in Paris sometime around 7-8 pm we had to take ANOTHER subway train to get to our hotel. I must admit with the little that I was able to see of Paris in the dark I was still very impressed. Though it is always scary to go to a new place. We were lucky to find someone how was nice enough to direct us to the right train platform so that we could get to our hotel. Which took another 20 minutes to get to. So in the end it took us almost 24 hours to reach out hotel from toronto. and I was tired very tired.. but we had to wake up early next day to go site seeing..... but thats the next day

Paris was wonderful though, saw the Louvre, the Eiffel Tower, the Champs. I would totally go again.

2nd interruption : Planning related

2005-11-16T08:14:00.001-08:00

For a blog that suppose to be about planning issues, I've realized that I have barely any in here. Which isn't surprising because planning is boring.. At least its not as exciting as they make it out on the news.

from what I've noticed there are the same recurring issues in most planning actions. Since most planning is essentially community planning, in an urban environment, there tend to be a great many residential and public concerns that arise... But their always the same ones.

1. Building height
2. Traffic
3. Community services

if you were to take a look at the council agenda, you would generally find it chock full of applications for demolished permits, building permits, traffic studies, community action plans, etc., etc.,when these things come up they always seem important, they always have some relevance to someone. But they are piss boring to report on! And its so dry!...

Wednesday: Rainy Day Musing

2005-11-07T09:30:00.003-08:00

It’s a raining and its a crappy week already, I would like very much to go home... but I can't, Since I just got to the office. Work is picking up since I’ve got to set things up for deadlines in April. And since I’ll be away in December I’ll miss out on essential Dilbert meeting days, so late nights for me too. Hopefully not that many. Which reminds me I really should get my passport.

A lot of the people I know are taking Friday off, I almost forgot completely that it was Remembrance Day (no pun! Intended) I think ill still be coming to work on that day cause at least it will be quiet, but I’m required to be at the cenotaph at old city hall for the Remembrance Day ceremonies. I’m a little sentimental unfortunately, so I’ll probably get a little choked up (not too much).

On another note, it’s happens every year, but I still can't get use to Christmas music in November.. and its irritating to listen too cause it sticks in your head once you leave the store. Especially since the store is playing reggae Christmas music, or something really bizarre. I’ve already been wandering through the bay store looking at Christmas ornaments, not that we would need any.. what with being away for the holidays. Besides advertising for Christmas, the Bay has also been advertising for the Winter Olympics already, I really like the scarves I think that’s what I’ll end up collecting actually.. Olympic scarves.. I don’t know why, other then their red and practical in winter. I kind of wish that Roots was still the official Olympic clothier though.

That guy, J... that I met at the singles night … it has been a while, almost 2 months, I kept figuring "he couldn’t possibly be interested" and maybe he’s not but he still manages to meet me at least once a week.. or every other week, And he’s still very busy…but he does try to call, or at least says he will call, but.. i dont feel like im that important or even a moderate portion of his life. im just not use to this total lack of communication..I can be patient.. To a point. I just wish he would talk to me more. Cause I’m starting to have imaginary conversations with an imaginary him… and that just makes me look crazy. As well as pathetically lonely. i think I'll give it one more month after he's had time to settle down, in his new place and at work.... or i could just kick myself and swear off dating like i said i would.

Anyway on Sunday if any one wants it here is a free admission coupon to hobby star comic convention.

Sunday, Nov. 13th Our guest artist will be DC superstar Chris Batista, famed penciller of JLA and Hawkman who will soon be taking on a huge DC series in 2006.
http://www.hobbystar.com/ComicConTorontoV2/images/COUPON.jpg

Christmas Travel! Paris And England Oh My!

2005-10-24T19:11:00.001-07:00

So believe it or not I actually will be traveling to Europe for the first time in 10 years ! to visit my aunt and my cousin. I am greatly looking forward to the time away. However since I haven't been a full time employee for very long I may have to take unpaid leave. I'm thinking it will be worth it, it has to be its Farkin Paris!

I've made a number of observations on booking travel to Paris and London.

for one, staying in Paris is cheaper than staying in London, and I'm not entirely sure why. A friend of mine, his parents went away to Paris for one week... $1100 dollars, including airfare and I think continental breakfast, they went in October which is a really good time to travel in Europe cause its past summer and not quite the holiday season yet.

the only problem so far has bee booking the chunnel tickets and the combined hotel. Every time I've tried to purchase the combination of eurostar ticket and hotel stay, the euro star website crashes, as well when you fill out an account you can no longer book both the hotel and train, which makes me strongly suspect that its just a scam for eurostar to get people to book. But it doesn't matter I ended up booking the train tickets and getting a hotel for cheaper than what was being offered on eurostar.com by going to www.hotels.ca.

I still have to book the London part of the trip but that shouldn't be to hard, ill probably do that by my next paycheque :p

Stupid Profile Posts!

2005-10-13T14:23:00.001-07:00

THIS IS ALL JANE'S FAULT!!

002. nicknames: DA… if you call me Mandy I’ll break you in half
003. sex: female
004. birthday: may
005. age: 26
006. star sign: Taurus
007. place of birth: Toronto, Canada
008. Current residence: Toronto, Canada
009. Hair colour: black
010. Eye colour: Brown
011. Height: 5’8
012. Writing hand: right

Body Ills /Skills
013. Do you bite your nails? No I clip em
014. Can you roll your tongue? Yes both ways.. Makes for exciting times
015. Do you have any habits? Lots
016. Can you raise one eyebrow at a time? Yes.. Just like the Rock
017. Coloured hair: never!.. but would like hi-lights
018. Tattoos and where: maybe someday
019. Piercings and where: ears
020. Do you make your bed daily? 6 out of 7 days
021. Which shoe goes on first? Whichever is closest
022. Speaking of shoes, have you ever thrown one at someone? I threw a chair once
023. What jewellery does you where 24/7? Earrings most of the time
024. How many cereals are in your cabinet? 3.. but I don’t eat any of them
025. What utensils do you use eating pizza? none...
026. Do you cook? Only if I have to
027. How often do you do the dishes? Only when I have too, that’s what the electric dishwasher is for
028. How often do you brush your teeth? twice daily
029. How often do you shower or bathe? Once a day
030. How long do these showers last? 25mins+
031. Hair drying method: hair dryer or towel
032. Do you swear? rarely
033. Do you mumble to yourself? Not really
034. do you spit in public? Only gum
035. person you talk most on the phone with? No one at the moment *sniff *sniff
036. what colour is your bedroom? White.. but not for long HAHAHA!
037. do you use an alarm clock? yes, and I hit it every morning
038. name one thing and person you're obsessed with: so many things really…….
039. window seat or aisle: window … might as well
040. what’s your sleeping position: all over.. I fidget in bed
041. what kind of bed do you like? Warm ones
042. in hot weather do you use a blanket? Light sheet
043. do you snore? Don’t think so… but I might talk in my sleep
044. do you sleep walk? No thankfully
045. do you talk in your sleep: see above
046. do you sleep with a stuffed animal? I wouldn’t call it that
047. how abut the light on? Never.. maybe a lava lamp
048. do you fall asleep with the TV or radio on? Cant sleep if the TV’s on

When Was the Last Time You
049. watched Bambi? Haven’t see the whole thing
050. talked on the phone? All day
051. read a book? yesterday
052. punched someone? Haven’t done that yet… give me some time.

Future
053. where do you see yourself ten years from now? Hopefully rich and living in retirement
054. who are you gonna marry and where? …. Don’t know
055. how many kids do you want to have: …. Don’t knowFriends
056. who are your best friends? Jane, Silvia, Chawana, Enoch, Phillip.. so on so forth
057. what friend do you hang out with the most? So far Silvia
058. what friend makes you smile the most? all of them!
056. friend that you fight with the most? …. None so far
060. one you talk to on the computer the most: Enoch
061. friend that you miss the most? all of them!

10 Favourites. . .
Favourite Colour: RED
Favourite Food: Pine apple tarts
Favourite Band/Singer: hard question… um fru fru
Favourite Song: anything that's good
Favourite Movie: Minority Report
Favourite Sport: bowlingFavourite Season: Summer (HOTNESS!)
Favourite Day Of the Week: Sunday
Favourite Ice Cream Flavour: Chocolate Chip Mint
Favourite Time of Day: 5pm9

Currents. . .
Current Mood: tired
Current Taste: salty
Current Clothes: orange sweater black pants and jacket
Current Desktop Picture: carnival ride at rapid speeds
Current Toenail Colour: none … but will be corrected soon.
Current Time: 5pm
Current Surroundings: office
Current Annoyance(s): report deadline and various other higher management
Current Thought: when’s he gonna call?

8 Firsts. . .
First Best Friend: Jane
First Movie: batman
First Screen Name: my name
First Pet: class goldfish
First Piercing: ears
First Crush: Ryan (highschool)
First Music You Remember Hearing: hmm...can't recall
First Car: not yet

7 Lasts...
Last Cigarette: never
Last Drink: a beer
Last Car Ride: this morning
Last Food You Ate: pineapple chicken
Last Movie Seen: Wallace and Gromit
Last Phone Call: Silvia
Last CD Played: Garden State Soundtrack

6 Have You Evers. . .
Have You Ever Dated One Of Your Best Friends: wanted too
Have You Ever Broken the Law: Yes...
Have You Ever Been Arrested: almost
Have You Ever Skinny Dipped: yes (in the amazon..guyanese style)
Have You Ever Been on TV: maybe
Have You Ever Kissed Someone You Didn't Know: …not sure

5 Things. . .
You're Wearing: orange sweater and black pants (Halloween appropriate)
Done Today: called RFP applicants
You Can Hear Right Now: the heater blowing
You Can't Live Without: someone to talk too
You Do When You're Bored: wander aimlessly

4 Places You've Been. . .
1. New York
2. England
3. Detroit
4. Montreal

3 Memorable experiences....
1. Trip to New York
2. First Halloween disaster party
3. Getting new full time job

2 Choices. . .
Black or White: black
Hot or Cold: HOT

1 Thing you want to do before you die. . .LIVE!

how do you know?

2005-10-03T07:11:00.001-07:00

How do you know when your in love with someone?
when do you admit to your self that you "more than" like someone?
when or how do you know if its just the sex their interested in or if their actually interested in you?

... crap im feelin melencholy

Ive never been one for one night stands (too risky), nor casual dating for that matter. in the entire time of my dateing experience I've had 4 first dates ( in some peoples book i guess thats kinda pathetic) 2 of which become honest to goodness relationships for good or ill. Ive always found that meeting someone is easy i can be myself and talk and be confident, but once i start liking that person and am interested in them as more then just a pleasant conversation it usually goes straight to hell at that point. i become a less confident person and i really really hate that.

maybe I take relationships too seriously, or maybe I am investing to much of myself i dont know.
its kinda nerdy feeling when you want to show some one you like them and not come off as a stalker....... or maybe thats just me.

Turning point

2005-09-23T07:08:00.001-07:00

I don't normally talk about relationships... (well good ones any way) but recently I ended my 2 year relationship with my boyfriend. After my first disaster at being in relationships, E was the best thing that ever happend to me. He made me laugh, we had similar interests and he would always call and we would tell each other about our day or the things we were up to. And I do still love him, the problem is the kind of love I felt for him changed. He started feeling more like my brother (eew) and less like my lover. Don't get me wrong this guy had passion, but it just wasn't the same and I never felt right. (and thats the really short short reasons.. there are others.. but i dont want to cry right now) So now we are just friends, and that's not easy either, but I'm willing to work on that.

anyway I started/attempted dating someone else; a guy who's for the most part, diametrically opposite to me. I like him but he has no time for me. So I don't know entirely how he feels about me. And after this experience I find I really really hate dating. My other friends have told me to keep trying and date a lot of other people, but I've found that I want some one I can see and spend time with and act like a goof with be long term. Unfortunately after this experience I still wouldnt try to get into a relationship beyond friendship with E again, for various reasons, for one he's still my closest friend, two I lost my chance and things would never be the same, and three, it hurts.

but anyhow, I think I'm gonna take a break from trying to find someone and just become a spinster with cats or parakeets, and a martini glass in one hand.

@@@@

So last night iI ended up at a MEETinTO event with a one Frankie Alexander, and a whole bunch of other people to taste beer. i dont particularly like beer but it was nice to get out and meet people. I had a chocolate flavoured beer, and then gave up and just had a really large sour apple martini.

It certainly felt alot better then waiting for the guy I'm supposedly dating to call me back. ( I HATE DATING!) next week friday I'm going to a martini bar so that should be fun, eventually my friend C will be coming downtown for an evening of speed-dating. and maybe even I'll go up to see my friend P at his university and party there... beats waiting i suppose.

Powerpoint is Satan!

2005-09-12T14:01:00.001-07:00

I had to help my boss with a presentation this past month regarding revenue shortfalls for this year. I was so proud of myself and my boss that we had managed to get it finished before the presentation was due to be presented.

every thing was fine on Friday.....

and then Monday happened. Monday was also the day that the replacement for my old position came in to start his new career in supervising.

it might have been because it was a Monday or because it was PowerPoint I don't know; but every thing that could go wrong in this stupid presentation did or at least caused me some degree of embarrassment.

9:15 - was suppose to meet the IT guy to set up the PowerPoint presentation in the board room ~ and he wasn't there, after 20 minutes when he did show up I had to run back to the office to get a power cable. Upon reaching the office again I found out there was something wrong to the PowerPoint presentation. and there were changes made to a number of slides

10:20 - ... Many colour print pages later with 20 minutes to go before we were to present everything got settled to some degree. or so I thought

10:30 - our presentation is delayed till after two

11:00 - after waiting until the 11 o'clock recess I find out from the IT guy that he wasn't able to properly set up the presentation... I spent the next 1hr with my new hire trying to figure out what the heck was wrong. It was solved with checking off one single check box... In PowerPoint.

12:00 - had to run back to the office to change the PowerPoint presentation again. And get a file, ran back to the council chamber to restaple the handout copies and load the new version of the PowerPoint presentation on the laptop

12:30 - left everything ready to go and went to lunch finally. but first had to go to office print out extra copies of the handout.

1:00 - finally went to lunch

2:00 - had to sit through 2 long winded presentations. I noticed that someone had disconnect the laptop so I knew I had to reset everything once it was our turn to present.

2:15 - boss forgot maps at office had to make new hire run back to the office and get them. New hire fell asleep right after ... I don't blame him

3:30 - finally its our turn.. and somehow the wrong version of the PowerPoint presentation has been loaded. throughs off my bosses ability to make the presentation. half way though I put up the correct version.

4:00 - back at the office....... My boss let me know id let him down.... lost faith in my skills...... argh! and thats what irritates me more the damn dissapointment

so thats why powerpoint is satan......

NEXT REMEMBER TO CHECK WHICH FILE IS THE RIGHT FILE!

ALOTOFWORK

2005-08-06T10:09:00.001-07:00

**EDIT** i figure the goals are a little out of order so ive changed them plus some arent likely to be realized before hell freezes over.

so its a Saturday in August, and its a beautiful day. it has been since 9 this morning when i got into the office. yes ... the office. As much as I would like to avoid it im already taking weekends to catch up on work, primarily cause i still havent let go of the research coordinator position nor have i gotten off my ass to find someone to replace me. though all of the students that could be considered for the position are pretty good....

sigh.... saturdays are not good days to try and be productive on....

I went to the eye doctor the other day, apparently becuase i sit so long in front of the computer every day i now need reading glasses cause my eyes are straining to much to read the screen. I fully intend to get bright red frames!

in other exciting news I have officially cut up and closed out my mastercard account. I am now steps away from being out of debt. the only big debt that remains is to pay for the debt mobile. it was quite rewarding though to finally cross that off my 2004 goal list. it was such a big thing that i now have written up a new goal list.. goal list?

oh its my yearly TO DO list.. like lose 10 pounds, pay off debt , refrain from killing anyone.. things like that. but now becuase im getting out of hock I've been able to add more wants..

so to share this is my new goal list for 2005-2006:

pay off car loan DONE!
get glasses done
get license G2
get back money for car NEVERGONNA HAPPEN
buy playstation 3 ( a must) BOUGHT A WII INSTEAD
save $3,000 for Germany/ENGLAND/JAPAN trip
save $135,000 for condo (by 2010) TOTALLY UNLIKELY
stay out of debt MEH
cancel remaining credit card. done

oh yah im not going to Japan next year.... im going to Germany. or england.... but i really wanted to go to Japan next year.......

New Job Troubles

2005-07-26T17:40:00.001-07:00

I realized the other day that I haven't posted any daily diatribes in a while, and the only reason (excuse) for that is that I'm still trying to get the hang of working full time in a real honest-to-goodness planning position. But I will tell you this; there have some oh so interesting happenings in the last couple of weeks.

for one I got my first paycheque! it was so beautiful! so full of money ! the only problem is they didn't deposit it in the right account so someone else got my money...but they gave it back thankfully. So I have an even bigger cheque coming in the next little while, and finally after 4 years I can pay off my MasterCard bill and cancel the blasted thing! soon.....

the other thing is I'm still taking care of my previous position, not because I have to.. They did tell me to hire someone else to fill it . But I can't bring myself to do it yet! probably cause I know what I'm doing in that job as opposed to not being sure what I'm doing in the new one. I plan to have a student come in once or twice a week, but I'm not sure if that's going to be enough, I know that's the way I started out here, but by the end of it I was always coming to work every day, and weekends some times.

and its funny too cause I got most of my previous job automated, a little more tweaking and I should be able to run both, with only one extra student to come in 2 days a week. in the mean time before I hire someone officially to the supervisor position i've been assigning each summer student to come in a work at the supervisor job.. One to give them the experience of an office environment but also to see how well they adapt to that environment and if they are cut out for the position. So far I've had 4 of my 7 students come in and try it out.

so far I haven't had what id call ALOTOFWORK, but I have had some things mostly its been setting up meetings and filling in applications for permits. But the first staff meeting is coming up on Thursday and i'm trying to at least go into it with some of the work completed... Though its not been a great deal of work there are somethings that im not sure about. such as doing up a business case for the purchase or transfer of city owned property, to where I work.... I need to get more comfortable doing pro formas so I can fill it out.

one side benefit (besides the free parking) is that I get to assign the more boring tasks to someone else... I guess that's just what getting a higher position means.. The higher you go the more work you can make some one else do :p.

or not.

moving to a new office

2005-06-30T14:06:00.002-07:00

so i moved over to my new desk.... two days ago.... its taken me two days to get everything organized and file most of my things away. however i still have 4 boxes of files sitting under my desk and a pile of paper that needs to be sorted through, as well as a stack of books that i have no idea what to do with. thats the one thing about changing jobs. sometimes you have to clear up a mess before you can even start.

ttyl.

GOT THE JOB!

2005-06-25T07:15:00.001-07:00

I got the job! im now the project analyst..... yeah!

I'd like to thank all the little people who helped me (sniff sniff) and my manager. and god...

:P

Funny thing is now that i got it i wonder if i really want it... the boss that i have now is amazing but he called to let me know that he wouldnt be my boss anymore.. at least not my direct report.. hes still my boss since the job is designated under two departments.. ah well its a small price to pay i guess for a full time job with a good dental and retirement plan.

I wont be surprised if my pay cheque is much smaller cuase of all the extras that they will now be taking out.

... now maybe i can get out of debt (-_-;)

new job

2005-06-14T12:15:00.001-07:00

.....so I'm still waiting to hear back about whether i or someone else got the job..... ive decided if i dont get the job im going back to school to get some more training. though ive learned that i enjoy the tasks for the project analyst position... since im doing the job now as i cover for the vacancy, i really hope they take that into account and give me the damn job..i want it..
:(

------------------
I just had my interview for the project analyst position ... i think i did terrible... ill have to see...
i didn't go in with confidence and was too !#%&^ nervous

but i dont think im going t0 get it.

i need a drink.....

ill let you know how it goes.... i couldnt hear anything through the door when they were discussing the candidates....

no more free time

2005-05-28T18:22:00.001-07:00

so its been a while since ive posted so i'll tell you all of the wonderful and interesting things that have been happening lately.

1. i met a really good bunch of girls the other day at a house warming and we went dancing afterwards at this club which was really cool cause it felt really comfortable meeting up with people.. for the first time and going to do stuff. i hope we get to meet up soon.

2. ive been bike riding alot lately with my sugar lumps of a boyfriend.. we are doing the Ride for Heart. i haven't collected any donations cuase im a lazy ass and i hate asking people for money.

3. works been crazy.. now on top of doing my research coordinator position, im covering the planning analyst position and the director of planning position.. cause my boss is away. so ive been getting all of these strange parking questions and half of the time i dont know what they are talking about.. but im living up to the code of the planner im "muddling through" really really hard.

4. i bought a GAMECUBE. yep just walked right into the store and picked up with a giftcard and plunked down some change for a memory card and a zelda game. needless to say i think about playing it all the time.. all the time. ive even cut work a little early on friday so i could go home and play it. the only problem is my mother doesnt like it hooked up to the tv in the living room so i have to use the one downstairs. the only problem with that is that its an old tv and doesnt have the right connections.... so now ive got to buy a big tv for my room haha!

more later......

Gonna Go to Japan Next May!

2005-05-15T08:42:00.001-07:00

yes yes daily viewers, I have finally made up my mind that I am going to Japan next year! so i have an entire year to save for my fantabulous trip. on top of that i plan to pop over to Hong Kong and see my long lost friend ... you know who you are!

you may be thinking why Japan and Hong Kong (its really humid! bad air etc etc) , I have wanted to go to Japan since i was 8 and Hong Kong since i was 13. its those stupid "find-a-place-in-the-world-and-do-a-report-on-it" that they make you do in school that got me really interested.. and since then its always been in the back of my mind to go. now all i need now is a place to stay thats cheap that me and my BF can fit in, and some tips on places to go eat and shop!
Im really looking forward to trying all kinds of food! asian foods my favourite. .. the only thing is im gonna have to refuse to eat anything thats an animal sexual organ, dog, cat, rare bird spit or cauliflower.. i have to draw the line there.

----------------
in other news my photo blogs been going well... some interesting comments from strangers .. and glories of glories i got a link back in someone elses blog (>_<,) sweet rapture!

FINALLY PAID

2005-04-26T15:35:00.001-07:00

I Have finally paid off the loan of fucktard.. if you dont know what im talking about ..

see here

and never never never never never trust a fucktard.. to be continued next feature "The Car Payments" dun dun duuun.

Never Hire Stupid

2005-04-26T09:41:00.001-07:00

Its that time of year again where I hire the students I need to conduct parking surveys for me. It's a lot of pressure to hire some one, you always wonder if your hiring the right person, then you get about 20 "suggestions" from people you work with about their sons or daughters that really need work. and what i've learned is the following:

1. NEVER NEVER let go staff the most experience.. even if you don't work well with them if they get the job done don't argue about it.
2. STICK TO YOUR GUNS don't take suggestions when you don't have the available positions to hire people.
3. REMEMBER TO COPY HR on the letters you send out.
4. FIND SOME WAY TO NEVER DO HIRING PROCESSES if you can help it. Just rehire rehire rehire. It saves your precious minutes of life.

woodturning advanced

2005-04-24T10:33:00.001-07:00

I went to another interest class on wood working again. this time it was a more advanced class and we make oil lamps. i think mine turned out pretty good actually. though it kind of looks like a coke bottle. One of these days im gonna actually get a lathe of my own. someday....

Before and After

2005-04-24T10:30:00.001-07:00

Its amazing what can happen to a person when you no longer have to be in school. Like for instants you can go from looking like a librarian nerd to super hotty hot.. though im not sure id classify myself as such. (hotty hot). You know what also helps.. intending to looking so good that ex-fucktards can lament fucking up so bad that they lose your wonderful companionship and eat themselves into oblivion. not that im still bitter or anything >:(

.............. anywhooo, moving on :p

but besides changing my entire appearance to be more proffessional, im finding that i have to go back to school in order to stay on top of the things related to my job, who would have thought that i would have needed linear regression at work.. but i do now.. doesnt that suck

WORK WORK WORK

2005-04-19T05:46:00.001-07:00

This is a picture of my desk at the moment.... work is starting to pile up lately, some of it is due to the summer survey work that will be coming up soon. i have interviews and work schedules to do. on top of that one of my coworkers is leaving so im gettng some of her work to do as well, but its alright.. I'm sad to see her go, and i really like and shes taught me alot.. but i want her job.. shes the planning analyst for the company, so in taking over some of her work ill get some needed experience in order to qualify for the job. the only thing is when i looked at the requirements for the job, proffessional accreditation was asked for. such as being a member of the OPA. Of course im not even a student member of that anymore, as it costs a ridiculous amount of money to maintain and there really isnt much benefit to it. .. other than it looks good on a resume. but it reminds me ive got to update my resume and send it in with a cover letter sometime in the next 2 weeks.

PHOTO BLOG! Cause if I don't have more time to waste

2005-04-12T18:53:00.001-07:00

So I've started a photoblog page after much consideration that I haven't already used up enough of my time in just randomly writing things down.... I'm pretty sure I wont end up updating the photo blog that often... As I need a new camera.

Enjoy!

....So.. No..transit strike?!

2005-04-11T07:21:00.001-07:00

So Sunday night my mother tells me theres no transit strike, which for most people would be really great. Except.. I work in Parking.... parking... meaning cars driving down and parking in lots cause their bus driver is on strike. meaning that the lots are full and the revenue should be up. But its not so bad with the good weather kicking in parking revenue has started to be better. And yah yah I know parking brings in a great deal of money in general, but like any industry; you can have low months. Especially for some reason from January to March.. don't know why.. but I'm sure my boss will tell me.

Public meetings

2005-04-09T14:59:00.001-07:00

Charettes are what you do until sanity prevails again.
- Patrick Condon

I have to go to a kooky granola free love "ideas" meeting..

Don't get me wrong, having a public meeting/charrette to discuss the possible changes that could be made to a community to improve it is a wonderful; but long and boring process. It helps foster the idea to the public that there is a government that is listening to them, (...Sort of) taking into consideration that since they are tax payers their wants and needs will be heard. (bukake bull#hit! I say!) . Though this view may seems incredibly pessimistic it is generally an accurate description. Now I only have this rather pessimistic view because I work at a city agency that is constantly considered by the public as the "big-bad-gonna-eat-your-children-and-steal-all-your-green-space" parking agency.

sound contradicting?

well being the lone parking representative at these meetings, the mere suggestion of placing parking in the area is not generally well received unless you put it underground or behind a building. Of course during these meetings its also suggested if you could possibly BUILD the parking, and 9 times out of 10 it would be a losing investment and time spent and 9 times out of 10 shot down by local residents. Eventually you just stop caring sometimes what the public wants cause they spend so much time bitching at you when your trying to help.

public meetings are the worst, I went to my first one a couple of month's back. Getting through a picket line and listening to "grey not green!" chants and crying children .. and through it all its made clear to me that I'm the bad guy... I'm pretty sure if I had been driving a car, my tires would have been slashed when I left the meeting.

and now a message from our sponsor: Firemen......

2005-04-06T07:00:00.001-07:00

Got an email from corporate communications today..

City Hall - firefighter training

Toronto firefighters will be rappelling down the back wall of City Hall to the podium level for training exercises between 8:30 a.m. and 3:30 p.m. on April 7, 13, 20 and 27. The
training will not affect access to City Hall.

Now imagine that all you had to do to become a planner would be to bungy jump off metro hall... I'd do it...

FINALLY! finished Tweaking!

2005-04-04T07:29:00.001-07:00

ARgh! I hate having to use a template from someone else.. So i've been remixing some elements and updating others of course since I don't really know enough about style sheets i've been futzing around tweaking and previewing till I got it just the way I want it...... Now I should actually write something ... shouldn't I? o_0

See Wil Run

2005-03-26T10:40:00.002-08:00

... yep.. thats Wil wheaton and his wife... and its his fridge too.. you know from star trek.... he has a blog too. ... he's still cute... anyways ... isnt it a little surreal looking at someone elses fridge online.. i have a perfectly good fridge of my own... i should go look at it, better whats in it..

im going to have a cookie now

See Wil Run

Sunday Class

2005-03-19T10:05:00.001-08:00

I had a jewellery making class last Sunday. I made this really cool bracelet which I want to make matching earrings for. I think this is a really good hobby.. but I wish i knew how to do more things, like make earrings, but maybe ill go to another class for that. I still have to get all of the neccessary tools and such.

the place that I went to is called Bead FX and its near eglinton and warden in a industrial area, right next to a prison. unfortunatley i was to busy wondering why there was a prison and ended up missing the street i needed and got lost, and ended up late for the class but they had a really nice teacher, and she walked me through the class on the parts that I had missed.

I hope I can get a chance to go back again, and pick up some more stuff, well at least when I get my next paycheque :p

STARTING A HOBBY...

2005-02-18T13:50:00.001-08:00

cause if i dont do something ill go crazy....

I've come to the point in my life were I need something to occupy my time with.. yah I know there is work, but thats work, and I can only read so many books, play so many video games, eat so many cookies.

So here are some places that I recommend for finding a hobby class to take part in. cause where i live makes it near impossible to find a class through the City parks and rec adult programs; that are of any interest. ( classes like "choosing the right colour" seems more like an idiot course.)

WOOD TURNING: if youve ever taken highschool shop class and have used a lathe and really enjoyed it and would like to try it again. the only place i could find in toronto that offers it as a day learning experience is at Lee Valley Tools, which has 2 location in Toronto, one in the east end and one in the west. I went for their woodturning 101 class and reaquinted my self with a lathe and it was good!.. I made something called a dibbler; which sounds like something sexual but isnt, i dont care though cause i enjoyed making it.

A dibbler....

JEWELLERY MAKING: I have a thing for earrings.. so one of the things I would like to do is make my own, cause i can never find the earrings that i like. So I found some classes to go to at a place called BeadFX their pretty much Toronto's most prominant beadery, that offers consistant lessons, a little pricey but most hobbies are.

Another downtown beadery for lessons is The Beadery but their site doesnt list their classes.

Another place that i will try at a later time is the Learning Annex. hopefully i can take some painting and sketch classes, maybe even take up pottery again.

As I stated earlier, I am very dissapointed with the offering of classes in the scarborough area of Toronto in terms of classes through the parks and rec department. However the one plus to this sad selection is that you can sign up for the classes online through the City of Toronto website. I seriously think that these classes are tailored toward idiocy at least in the Scarborough area, while in other areas of the city an adult can take a class in painting or clay or at least something remotely interesting. Scarborough area classes seem to consist of classes to pick colour and cook. anyway since its unlikely to improve im sticking to the private sector offerings for classes.

"DATE" AT THE TORONTO SYMPHONY

2005-02-09T19:00:00.001-08:00

A while ago I joined this website called twofortheshow.com its this site that lets you find show buddies on... or a date. But I put my profile with the specific goal of finding a show buddy, as I need to get out of the house a little more regularly.

I found a diverse set of people listed, and an interesting dilemma. The site doesn’t have the option of displaying a picture of the person your messaging.. which is good thing cause it does help cut done on people just looking for a pretty somebody. but actually meeting a person is very much like a blind date and its always a surprise to find out who your gonna meet. needless to say its not a site I log into everyday, rather its a pleasant surprise every now and then to find an email from someone looking to get together and go for a show or a drink or just to chat.

I was able to meet one nice person for a night at the Toronto symphony at Roy Thompson Hall. we decided to meet at "Hey Lucy" which is one of her favourite restaurants on King St. promptly at 6:45 p.m. now I’m a very nervous person when it comes to meeting new people so of course I was there early. and this is where not having a picture makes it a little hard. I had no real idea what she looked like, I had sent her my picture but never got hers. so I waited outside, early of course. and as I was waiting this guy came up to me and asked me if I wanted to go inside and have dinner.. so imagine I’m already nervous and approached by a strange somebody, I said no and thankfully he went away, at which point I stopped waiting outside and went in for a drink. which I sure felt I needed.

I did end up meeting my "friend date" Kats her name, she’s really nice and lives downtown. we talked, had a drink.. me I laughed to loudly and felt nervous, and I’m still not entirely sure I didn’t make an ass of myself. That evening we went to see "An American in Paris" a wonderful set of music by Gershwinn (was made into a movie with Gene Kelly) and I really had a wonderful time and Kat and I had a nice discussion of the music. She was able to score a really cool deal for people aged 18-29 called tsoundcheck so for 20 bucks we got front row seats to the symphony.

at the end of the night we talked some more than said good night. next time I hope I get to pick the place we go, I’m hoping I can get her to go to an opera. the next day I signed up for my own tsoundcheck account

THE DETROIT AUTO SHOW

2005-02-05T11:29:00.001-08:00

... or going to see cars i can't buy and cant afford....

I was invited by my boyfriend to go to the Detroit Autoshow a couple of monthes ago... and i said "sure I'll go" and after the fiasco of trying to get a passport (which i never did) i ended up just taking a drivers license and a birth id with me instead. of course the day that we left it snowed so hard it made it difficult to see the road. but it was ok. we spent the trip there and back listening to opera.. i can now say ive listened to La Traviota and Carmen and least know whats going on. and watching the sun come up through the snow and ice covered trees was extra special.

when we got to detroit we had breakfast at this really nice diner, and got our pictures drawn by this cartoonist who's gonna end up working for DC comics... he was a nice guy. i hope i get to read a comic he pencils. that would be neat, he even drew us batman!

they really go all out for the autoshow in detroit.. it makes the one in toronto look like a cardboard display.. and ive never seen such big TV screens in my life. i wanted to take home the tvs more than the cars.

I personally am not into cars.. the only reason i have a license is to go clubbing and buy alcohol. my boyfriend; the typical male that he is, and being an engineer really enjoyed himself. he went there specifically to get pamphlets for all the german model cars, which are his favourites.

i just took pictures of volkswagon and looked at the pretty colours

but i must admit some of the cars were really really nice

most of the show was a blur , we couldnt stay long cause we had to get back to toronto for work the next day, but i did get a chance to walk around downtown detroit , they were having their own winterfest, some things were very impressive such as the pavilions and the marshmellow roasting bins.. THAT is one thing I'd like to see in Toronto's winter fest may be have couple at dundas square or at nathan phillips for a couple of hours and invite families to come roast marshmellows and make smores... plus they'd serve as great warm ups for skaters..

as it is winterfest is almost over.. and i missed it this year.

Old History

2004-08-11T14:38:00.001-07:00

As much as I would like to write about the present, I find I still have
quite a few things to rehash about the past. Let's just say I'M still working
through my "feelings". ~me

1. Never Date a Guy Younger than Yourself

I dated a guy for 3 1/2 years, got engaged to him, and was happy with him regardless of how hard it was to be in a relationship with him. Lets call him fucktard, cause that's what he is. In the time that I spent with fucktard between the arguments and the kissing (to put it mildly), the lack of trust for me on his part, I learned the fickleness of men and the stupidity that is fucktard. Oh did I mention the 13,000 + debt of his that he left me to pay off.

2. Never Loan your Fiancee Money($13,000)

A word to those in a relationship; no matter how long you have been engaged with someone, or married to someone for that matter, never.... never enter into a co-sign agreement with them on their behalf; for a car or a loan... anything! don't do it.

If they can't get it on their own and its something for just themselves, you have to ask yourself... Why? Why can't they get it on their own? Poor credit? Less than full-time hours? A record of irresponsibility with money? thinking back on it, I really should have walked away at that point, but I thought I was in love and I thought he was responsible.

Boy was I wrong! For the entire time fucktard had that car ( a lovely Honda Accord with leather interior), it was never paid for, it got into more then one accident resulting in thousands of dollars in damages. On top of that, fucktard lied to his insurance company about damages, never paid his insurance on time and at one point started driving without insurance. To top it all off I was not aware of the fact that fucktard was fucking up so badly, every time I asked him about car payments he would say that everything was fine and that he was taking care of it. I didn't find out that he had stopped paying for the car entirely until I called the car leasing place myself only to find that they were on the verge of suing me and fucktard.

and who is the one is responsible? Me.

who ends up paying for the car, and doesn't even have a license? Me.

in the mean time fucktard is "seeing other people" with no concern for his bills, probably cause i got my stuff back from him and after finding out what he was saying behind my back never called him back...

When I did get the car leasing place to reposes his car he was mad at me because I told them to take the car back. and to this day fucktard has not made any effort to pay for the car or the damages, instead he sits on his ass in his social assistance housing with his social assistance unemployed mother and criminal brother, and does nothing. Oh did I mention he got fired from his well paying IT job with a major Toronto TV station? well he did. why because he was irresponsible .. and a fucktard

For the entire time that I knew him, fucktard was getting paid a good large salary and not once in the 3 1/2 years that I knew him was he able to improve where he was living or save a dime, let alone finish his high school diploma, even though he had one .. one credit left to finish. I on the other hand have been paying for university on my own, and have been working part time at various positions for very little pay. YET I'M THE ONE PAYING THIS IDIOTS BILLS... WHY ? WHY YOU SAY >> AM I AN IDIOT ? Damn right I am!! I trusted a fucktard.. but why am I paying it? Because I have the integrity to keep my promises, and I signed my name to something making a promise, so I bite the bullet and pay the man $10,000 .

Mind you I will get around to suing fucktards fat black ass... though it may not be worth it since he can't get a job.

So where does the remaining 3,000 dollars come in. well in addition to the car, fucktard also got me to co-sign on a loan. Again little by little he would miss payments and I would end up paying because I would keep getting scary calls from the credit agency that loaned him the money. ( I also had to pay off $1,000 in gas and another $500.00 from a credit card on my own which he used, but I don't count that since at that point I just wanted to get away from him and be damned the money he owed me... mind you that doesn't stop me from trying to get it back now)

That was a year and a half ago, fucktard still has not paid a cent or acted responsibly in paying for the car or the loan. im finished school and almost out of my own debt and just starting my career in planning. I still have to put my plans on hold I still have to deal with an ex-fiancee's mess and until its over and done with I will still be bitter about it?
wouldn't you?

in closing the moral. don't trust a fucktard

Good Morning and pass the Eggs

2004-08-11T05:48:00.001-07:00

Have you ever woken up one morning with the urge to plan?

I don't know who the hell would, which makes me wonder why I ever took planning as a feild of study in university. I have a horrible sense of direction sometimes, I have a short attention span and I don't have a very good memory. So why planning? well there wasnt anything else interesting on the university course selection sheet when I applied. and thus begins my career in planning.

I attended Ryerson POLYTECHNIC university, before they went and changed the name. i spent 5 years in a 4 year program only to come out of it with very little understanding of what planning is. Luckily I was hired in a city agency to work in their planning department as a research analyst and survey coordinator. its been a good learning experience. I still dont know what planning is, but im hoping I'll find out soon.

please stay tuned and pass the eggs.